Juggling thoughts

At a conference I once attended to cover a feature story, a young, well-educated man presented his innovation: a kitchen appliance. His pitch leaned heavily on one phrase: “Made easy for housewives.” He repeated it often. And every time, it felt wrong. Not because the intent was malicious, but because the language was lazy. Two words: 'housewife and homemaker' are often treated as synonyms, yet they are separated by a deep line of respect. Then came a moment of quiet correction. A senior woman, who leads one of the state’s most respected women weavers’ collectives, stepped onto the dais. With grace and a smile, she said, “Let me correct this first. They are homemakers, not housewives.” The applause was instant and deserved. You see… a house cannot marry a wife. Because words matter. Because labels define worth. Let’s do the math society conveniently ignores: A full-time cook. A housekeeper. A tutor. A nurse An errand runner. A manager. A caregiver. That’s easily ₹25,000 a month...

 As I traverse the length and breadth of India, I'm constantly reminded of the deep-seated regional biases that permeate our country. The tendency to judge fellow Indians based on their geographical origins.  I feel media stance has amplified prejudices that has long being ingrained,and fueled divisions which isn't even necessary. The Blame Game: A Two-Way Street When deregotary incidents  occur in any  states, we often resort to blaming entire communities or regions.  Unfortunately, people from the North-East , including me, are not immune to this behavior either, frequently stereotyping every Bihari, every Punjaban, every Bengali, every Miyas and to an extent that every one from UP, MP, Maharashtra,Rajasthan are all non-local Biharis 😄. We sensationalize and generalize, attributing negative traits to entire groups. But it's not every North-Easterners who do that. So are no mainlanders the same.  The weight of misconceptions is heavy.  I've lost coun...

 Let’s pretend it’s the 90’s and we are reading Arundhati’s article on the morning newspaper. A long column, the kind that demanded your attention over chai, not a hurried look between two beeps of your phone. We are living in an ultra-fast world. A world that boasts itself on speed of delivery, of data, of consumption. Every day something new evolves, something transforms. Yet, in this acceleration, our lives are being reduced to those ten-second scrolls of distraction. We move too quickly between work, notifications, schedules. Always clearing schedules, never lingering.  No time for the real people around us. No time to pause, No time to read and truly absorb anything that exceeds three sentences because attention itself has become a luxury.  There was a time, not long ago, when friendship meant the freedom to knock on someone’s door without any notice, when affection was not measured in emojis but in cups of tea shared on lazy afternoons. Strangely, today we must fir...

 In this fast-moving world, the quiet heaviness of seasonal depression can sometimes settle into our hearts before we even notice. We find ourselves feeling drained, distant, and disconnected even from God. And when that happens, our first instinct is often to withdraw from everything and everyone. We stop reading Scripture, our prayers grow faint, and we drift from fellowship. Somewhere deep inside, a small voice whispers that we must look perfect before we return to God. That’s the mirage of perfection : the lie that makes us believe that our flaws disqualify us from His love. But nothing could be further from the truth. God never asked us to be flawless . He simply asks us to come. To bring our fears, failures, and broken hearts to Him. He already knows our weaknesses, every single one and still calls us His own. Our imperfections don’t drive Him away; they draw Him closer. It’s in our weakness that His strength is revealed. The real invitation of faith begins when we stumble....

Sarah Allen’s It’s OK Not to Be OK is a gentle, heartfelt reminder that all emotions , even the difficult ones deserve space. The book beautifully tells children that feeling sad or upset doesn’t make them weak, it simply makes them human. Too often, we unknowingly silence the emotions of our children. We tell them to stop crying, to “be strong,” without realizing that strength can also mean being honest about how we feel. Especially in our Naga style of parenting, we normalize certain phrases that carry deep emotional impact. When our sons cry, we tell them, “uno eloe ane undo kya la?” (Are you a girl? Why cry like one?) And when our daughters are bold or outspoken, we ask, “eboe esua hetata khunga la nung?” (Why are you being so strong-headed like a boy?) So then, we don’t just correct their behavior, we shape their understanding of emotion and identity. Our words slowly teach boys to suppress their feelings and girls to silence their strength. No wonder we’re raising another stereo...

 That morning, the city woke in steady rain I can't really stop to care about, when I saw that boy. The one with a chicken-plucked look across the rail track: his hairs were tufted circle on top. He was that caught my eyes in the madding crowd. He seemed even to know his place as unworthy striver, of the one no one would look away from for long. He lifted his sack to collect rags: a ticket to buy his bread.  The train was on the run but that would not stop him from collecting every bit of rag. People passed by him, pushing, dashing and the other boys smirked before the rain that was dousing and sweeping all of the rags stupidly into the gutter. I was half in love with his doing. Nine, or maybe ten he would be. He then twitched in sublime irritation, cursing, maybe ,the rain. Harder it poured, up again, hard to shelter his soaking head with the sack but he pretty much managed problems, and now came the move that got me staring on still. His twitch becalmed at last and he stoo...

 I once taught English to Korean students in Guwahati, and they asked, 'What kind of English do Indians speak? It doesn't sound American or British.'  I jokingly replied, 'We speak "Hin-lish" in India, a mix of Hindi and English with our regional languages.' As a Naga, I added that I speak "Nag-lish," influenced by my Naga-Lotha dialect. I asked them what they thought was the universal standard of English. Is it American or British? It is neither. Communication is about expressing ourselves clearly, not about perfect accents. Many students struggle with confidence due to fears of not sounding 'right.' There is no 'right' way to speak English – clarity and basic grammar are what matter. Using complex vocabulary like Shashi Tharoor's might impress some, but if your audience doesn't understand, communication fails. Effective communication is about being understood, not really about how good the accent is or to showcase your v...

He was trying hard to balance the puri lunch plate on his left hand and the hot glass of tea on the right. Half-naked with bare foot, he had to walk the sun  scorched road. Even I was finding it difficult to cross,as the cars never stopped in the traffic chaotic city road. And that job of the little boy seems to be the toughest of all the jobs in the world that moment . He was so careful with each of his step as he had the plate and the tea cup. What if he drops?   This scene caught my attention in and between the crowds. I am not very sure of his age, but the first look on his face made me assume he must be seven or so. I went closer to him, and noted through his over cautious steps that maybe this is his new job as a chai wala. The fear feeling of dropping the lunch on his hands can be read right on his forehead through the shrink lines and eye wrinkles. He shrugged every time he made an attempt to cross the road . He failed several times , beca...

In lot of the marriage I admire, I like to see  where the wife keeps her surname.  "A wife doesn't come from nowhere; she belongs somewhere,and it should be respected." My maiden name represents my ancestry and the reputation I've built. Why must I surrender it because I married ?  I wasn't a "distressed damsel" in need of rescue; I was a woman with my own history and identity, equally important as my husband's.  So why is mine presumed invisible? Preserving my family name is crucial, as it would have ended with my generation. My grandparents had sons, who passed on their name to the next generation. I want to honor my lineage, just as my husband honors his. I would never expect my husband to move his last name or to hyphenate his last name with mine.   To those who choose to take their spouse's last name, we proudly celebrate your decision. It's a personal choice that deserves respect. However, to those who feel pressured to change: choose a...

  In the pursuit of equality, we've become obsessed with proving that women can do everything men can do.  We, Women weren't created to do everything men can do. Women were created to do everything men cannot do. -Redefining Our Value We weren't created to replicate men's strengths. Instead, we bring distinct perspectives, skills, and qualities that complement and surpass what men can offer. -Embracing Our Differences It's time to recognize and celebrate our unique value. We weren't made to fit into a mold created by society; we were designed to break it and create our own. -Unleashing Our Potential Let's focus on what we do best and leave the rest. We are capable of achieving greatness, not in spite of our femininity, but because of it.

Some years back when I participated in a session on 'Gender Sensitive Language' organized by CBSE , I was struck by the profound impact of language on our perceptions and attitudes towards gender. The words we use at home and in school matter, as they shape our thoughts and behaviors. We often perpetuate gender-based stereotypes, restricting our children's potential. Phrases like 'boys don't cry,' 'girls are nurses, boys are doctors,' and 'be strong like a man' can be replaced with more inclusive language. A striking example from the session was a photo of a road construction site with a sign that read 'Men at Work.' The irony? 'Women work all the time at home, but when men work, they need signboards.' This humorous observation highlights a deeper truth. Equality is not solely a female right; it's a human right. Why can't boys cook? Why can't girls ride a Royal Enfield? It's time to challenge these outdated norms. ...

We've all got parts of our past we wish we could redo.  Moments we replay in our heads, wishing we'd done things differently.  But here's the truth: your past isn't a life sentence. It's just one chapter in your story. What matters most is what you choose to do now.  Every day, you get to turn the page, write a new story, and decide that your story doesn't end with pain, mistakes, guilt, or heartache.  You're not stuck, and you're not defined by what happened or the choices you made. You're evolving, and the beauty of life is that you get to take the pen back and write something new – something true to who you are now.  So, stop looking back with regret. Your past shaped you, but it doesn't define you. Look forward with intention.  You're in control of how your story ends, and trust me, it can still be extraordinary.

 Over the past eight years of being an educator, I've witnessed a seismic shift in teaching paradigms. Having taught before, during, and after the pandemic, I've seen firsthand the evolving challenges. The Elusive Job Description of a 21st-Century Teacher. In today's educational landscape, teachers are expected to be: 1. Master Multitaskers: Manage classrooms of 30 diverse students, addressing individual needs while delivering curricula. 2. Gap Fillers: Bridge pandemic-induced knowledge gaps with rigorous lessons, while teaching emotional intelligence for some parents won't teach them at home. 3. Edutainers: Outshine smartphones and iPads in engagement and entertainment value. 4. Differentiation Experts: Differentiate because one size doesn’t fit all but we also need a track record so here's a standardized exam and if they fail: it's your fault. 5. Accountability Balancers: Hold students accountable but you can't give them zeros, accepting late work,because ...

As speakers of one of the world's richest and second most spoken languages, we're incredibly fortunate. Growing up, English was a fundamental part of our education, and for many of us, it was often the easiest subject.  However, it wasn't until I delved into linguistics during college that I truly appreciated the complexities of the English language. My journey into phonetics was nothing short of revelatory. I recall laughing at the correct pronunciations of words I had misspoken my entire life. It wasn't the stylish or posh accents that amused me, but the realization that I had been mispronouncing words for so long. All my life those words were lies! As I began teaching language, I prioritized phonetics, and although it was challenging initially, it's been an enriching experience. Unfortunately, linguistics and phonetics remain unfamiliar territories for many highly educated individuals. However, these fields are crucial and captivating. Linguistics encompasses the...